"The good news is that there are three magic relics, relics strong enough to bring magic back to the empire. The bad news is that they're lost, or destroyed, or something because hello! No magic."

'Zork: Grand Inquisitor is the 11th installment in the Zork series.

You are an AFGNCAAP (Ageless, Faceless, Gender-Neutral, Culturally-Ambiguous Adventure Person), also a vacuum-cleaner salesperson living in the town of Port Foozle. The city is under occupation from the Grand Inquisitor (Erick Avari, from Heroes and Stargate), a fascist leader who has physically banned the use of magic from all the realms under his command.

After finding a disused lantern in the sea, you take it to Antharia Jack (an Indiana Jones parody played by Dirk Benedict, from The A-Team and the original Battlestar Galactica) and find out that the lantern houses the spirit of an exiled Dungeon Master (Michael McKean, from pretty much every single Christopher Guest movie ever made) who charges you with the quest of finding three magical artifacts in an effort to bring magic back to the realm and overthrow the Grand Inquisitor.

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